Weight Loss for Lazy People

You all know my struggles, and boy do I struggle, with weight loss.

The last time I wrote about it, I then committed to about 4 weeks of counting points and doing well, but without exercising at all. Then, I went out-of-town to see my mom, decided to splurge, fell off the bandwagon and have been half assing it since then.

So, I lost 5 pounds, gained them back, and here I am, oh about 6-8 weeks later?

And let’s rinse and repeat because, hey, it’ll probably happen again!

And again.

Dear God why is this so hard?

I know a lot of people say that fat people are fat because they are lazy. Then fat people get all upset because they have a thyroid issue or some medical attention or are big boned or whatever…

Personally, I’m coming to terms with the fact I am fat because I AM lazy. I know, sounds harsh, but truth hurts. And it hurts to be fat.

Big time.

Pun intended.

I want to lose weight, look like a JLO/Jessica Alba hybrid and still eat what I want and sit on my ass watching my TV shows every night in my super huge night shirt that hides every ounce of fat.

Wow, I sound pretty pathetic now that I said that out loud.

But it’s true. So. I know I’m not alone. Perhaps you’re feeling this way, too. I guess what I need to think about during these moments is that being lazy and overweight not only leads me to be unhealthy, but it leads me to be unhappy. Since I’ve put on all this weight since my wedding (like a ton…it’s awful…omg…), I now don’t go to the mall to shop for clothes. I go to the mall and stick to buying pretty shoes, handbags and jewelry or stocking up on stuff that smells like donuts at Bath & Body Works. You know, stuff that doesn’t revolve around getting my thunder thighs into the latest trendy, cute clothes. With the exception of plus size stores, I can’t really buy any clothes at the mall.

And that is sad. I miss the days of being able to fit into clothes at New York & Company or Anne Klein or White House Black Market. Now I shamefully do the walk to the “woman’s” section of the department store or I try to be blissfully oblivious and shop from home to avoid seeing my rolls magnified in a 3-way mirror under harsh lighting and dressing rooms that smell like armpits and pee. Oh, oh, and I also hate to see the “W” behind my size. It’s bad enough it’s a LARGE number, do we hafta add a W for like “WIDE ASS” after it? I mean, gosh.

BUT, rather than give up, I somehow never lose sight of what I want. I want to be healthy. I want to be thin. I want to shop in normal stores again.

I want to feel better about myself.

So, I’m devising a weight loss plan for lazy people, like myself.

I do so much sitting around at home in the evenings from about 6-11 pm, so part of my lazy people weight loss plan involves scheduling stuff in the evenings so I am more productive and more active.

4 times a week, from 6:30-7:30 pm, I will engage in some form of exercise. At 6:30, I will stop what I am doing, change into workout clothes and MOVE. Then from 7:30-8, I will shower and all that jazz. From 8-9 pm I will work on blog posts, with original content, so I can actually try to get in the habit of posting regularly instead of sporadically. Then from 9-9:30, I will do stuff around the house in order to not have to spend all my weekend doing housework. Then from 9:30 until bedtime, I will watch TV or troll online, etc.

Just 4 evenings a week. The other evening I can use to catch up on my DVR or do grocery shopping, menu planning, etc.

On weekends, I have to exercise on Saturday or Sunday.

And as far as eating goes, I get off track when I don’t plan, or when I allow myself to totally splurge. Oh and when I go out drinking. This means I have to think ahead and plan, plan, plan. I will stick to what has always worked for me…the old school Weight Watchers flex points plan.

Will this work? Who knows.

There has to be a way for lazy people to lose weight. If only desire produced results.

But speaking of shopping, there is a new line of clothes I am in love with (especially for work!) that I will be writing about tomorrow. I know it’s so hard to be plus size and confident, so I am excited to write about some of the stuff I’ve bought from this fab brand/store.

What do you do when you have no energy to focus, workout and lose weight, but tons of desire to?